Most epic office pranks

Caution! epic prank!

As seen on The Office, mouse in a vat of Jello

The red cups spell "PWND" and all the other cups filled with water

Superglued tacs to the toilet seat

Tin foiled cubicle

Replace everything with cardboard replicas

Post-it noting the whole car

Popsicles and Magazines Rant

I love popsicles, heck! I'll devour a couple scoops of ice cream any chance I get, nobody can resist creamy delights. The only problem I have is when the treats come together, creating a half Popsicle, half ice cream concoction. Who was the wise guy in marketing that thought of this? "Duh... hey guys I loves popsicles and ice cream, lets put dem two 2gether" I think this treat only satisfies people that like getting punched in the junk repeatedly or people that like fruit on their pizzas. Think about it, would you dip your grape Popsicle into a vat of ice cream? No! You wouldn't! Only a half wit would do that! Or a prego teenager on smack. Fuck interracial popsicle/ice cream treats I hate them all.

I was reading my magazine the other day and decided to read an article I found interesting. I thought I was finished but nope, this fucking magazine told me to turn to page 67 to continue my story! Fuck you magazine! Quit telling me what to do; besides, I am far too lazy to read on or flip pages. And it really peeves me when I decide to go to page 67 and accidentally start reading some other story, which confuses the fuck out of me "Algore did WHAT?!? I thought I was reading about manatees...” On the subject of reading have you ever had one of those friends that read the book before the movie? Most annoying people on the face of the earth. "Oh! The book was WaaaaaaaaaaAaay better!" I just want to say to them "Well you know what’s the best part! In the movie I didn't have to READ!”

F*ck you, Chores!

Fuck you, cleaning the fridge. How the hell do you get so dirty? I don't eat in there, I simply store food. What the fuck is that stain on the bottom shelf? Do gnomes have parties in here when I'm at work or something? Nasty little gnomes. And, for some reason, I feel really, really vulnerable when I'm bent over, scrubbing your gross shelves. Don't know why. So thank you for keeping my beer cold, but fuck you for making a mess of it.

Fuck you, paying bills. Every god damn month? Are you kidding me? I barely even surfed the web this month, I still gotta shell out all that cash? And, while I'm at it, fuck your pathetic little late fees. They're small enough for me to easily ignore them but they add up over time. So, thank you for the cell phones, heating, and the internet, but fuck you constant demands.

Fuck you, deleting old porn to make room for new porn. What man can make this decision? It's like choosing which of my kids to leave behind on the sinking ship. Fuck, this is killing me. I hate my laggy connection.

Fuck you, changing light bulbs. It's 2008, right? I figured by now technology would've at least advanced to the point where I don't have to stand on my wobbly chair and deal with this crap. Two bonus fuck yous: for scaring the crap out of me when I walk into a darkened room, innocently flick the switch and get momentarily blinded by that huge flash and terrifying pop! Also, for somehow convincing your light bulb brethren to join you, causing a chain reaction that means I'm filled with fear whenever I turn on a light. Pop! Pop! Pop! What, did you all join in a suicide pact while I was asleep?
Bastards.

Fuck you, washing dishes. Yes, I know, you smell funny, and I know the longer I wait, the more weird slime stuff is just going to accumulate on you. That's why I've pretty much switched to just using paper plates (fuck you, environment) and eating with my hands. I'm a caveman in my abode.

Finally, fuck you, writing this rant. Using my fingers is hard work.